Relationship Conflict

It’s another fight. It feels like you already had this fight, maybe not even that long ago, yet here you are, back at it. And you thought you got it sorted out last time, or at least maybe it got swept under the rug with hopes of being forgotten.

Yet the next time frustration, irritation, and other negative emotions run high, that pile of crap that’s been building up in your relationship comes right back up. You might be so sick of this that break-up or divorce may feel like the only option left.

I don’t want you to give up yet. You’ve muddled through all the conflict, and you made it to this page. Which means that you’re not ready to give up on this relationship either.

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The honeymoon period is over. The new relationship energy has dissipated. The passion you once felt for your partner doesn’t feel like it’s there anymore, even though you still feel the love for them. Something just feels like it’s missing.

Maybe there was a betrayal of trust in the relationship, and it hasn’t quite mended yet or you don’t know where to begin trying to fix it. You desperately want for things to go back to “how they used to be,” but no matter what you try, it just doesn’t happen.

And that’s OK. We change as people, and our relationships change as well. Whether it was a gradual shift in the relationship or something happened, things just aren’t the same anymore. Sometimes the change might be difficult to navigate on your own or within your relationship, which is why you are trying to find someone else (me) to help your relationship through this period.

How can relationship therapy help you?

Relationships aren’t as easy and straightforward as movies, TV shows, and our friends on social media make them seem. Depending on the people and issues involved, some couples are able to sort things out on their own, others have tried to do that and it just didn’t work. This is where I will work with you and help you figure this out!

Depending on your relationship’s concerns, some of the things we work on may include:

  • How to address difficult topics without getting heated, upset, angry, or shut down

  • How to communicate your needs and wants to your partner

  • How to really listen to one another, without getting defensive

  • How to reignite passion in the relationship

  • How to rebuild trust, connection, and emotional safety and vulnerability

  • How to renegotiate rules and boundaries within the relationship

  • How to navigate transitions in life and relationship

Common presenting concerns…

There are many things that bring couples into therapy, and below is a list of issues that I frequently see in my practice (although this is not an exhastive list!):

  • Couple conflict, often around one or more of these issues: sex, money, parenting

  • Addiction or substance abuse

  • Blended families

  • Work/Life/Relationship balance

  • Infidelity (past or ongoing)

  • Intimacy issues

  • Separation or divorce

  • Pre-marital counseling

  • Pornography use

  • Deciding to “open” the relationship

As a poly-aware and friendly therapist, I am also experienced in working with relationships that involve more than two partners. I can also help you and your current partner explore the realm of consentually non-monogamous relationships and take the next step in that direction.

As a kink-aware and friendly therapist, I can help you explore this side of your sexuality in your relationship. Or you can be certain that if your issues are not related to kink or BDSM, I will focus on what brings you to therapy rather than try to pathologize or make it about your sexuality.